Everyone has fantasies of that story…
The Bonnie and Clyde lifestyle
“All I need in this life of sin, is me and my girlfriend,
Down to ride till the very end, is me and my boyfriend ”
The great JayZ and Beyoncé
That one woman that will ride for you till the end beyond all your mischief and sneaking out and mistresses.
fellas we all dream of a woman that will stick with us through our toxic phases.
And women also have a man they will ride for. For a variety of reasons. Bonnie was the perfect example of the ride or die.
whatever the reason. We all fantasize of a Bonnie and Clyde type of love.
But to what cost?
WARNING: This is an opinion based post. If you differ in this argument you are more than welcome to debate with me in the comments but please keep it PG for the rest of my viewers.
In all my young life I’ve seen this ride or die mentality.
A loyalty that stands the tests of so much pain and suffering. I’ve seen it the most with women.
I’ve witnessed a lot of women struggle with toxic love by a man that will take advantage of them time and time again. I’ve seen men endlessly lust for a woman that would tolerate his hardships.
I’ve seen the vice versa as well. But it is not as common. However, This type of stuff does occur with men withstanding the hardships women bring.
By hardships I mean cheating, lying, stealing, physical and emotional abuse. And this list goes on.
There are women across the world that legitimately will ride with a man through all his mess to “get a ring” at the end.
Take for example Gucci Mane and his wife. Don’t get me wrong. I know little about their situation, nor am I talking down on them. However, I am using this as an example.
Gucci’s wife apparently stuck with him through his depression, his cheating, even jail. In the end they married.
To what end? All the emotional trauma she must’ve went through while Gucci was out sleeping with other women. Or potentially killing himself with whatever drugs he could’ve been taking. Yes they seem happy now but is the price to pay worth it?
Another example is the Jay Z and Beyoncé marriage crisis.
” of course sometimes shit goes down when it’s a billion dollars on the elevator!”
We remember the cheating scandals, the elevator episode. Etc..
lemonade brought all of that to light. Beyoncé revealed her pain and misery she went through in several songs.
The pain of riding through the storm of sneaking out Jay Z committed throughout the years.
Jay Z even admitted to all these accusations in his album 4: 44.
Although these women have found happiness in their marriages after the foolishness, the problem still lingers.
It’s this notion that we as men expect women to stay around while we get our selves together.
Yes, science proves that women mature faster than men.
However, that isn’t an excuse to go out and abuse these women that will do anything for us.
There’s one thing to have a woman see our potential as a father to children, or as a care taker, or as a genuine person. It’s one thing to stick with a man when he is depressed or fired or on the brink.
However, to make a women put up with toxicity or cheating or even both is not ride or die fellas.
We limit our values as men when we act in this way and expect women to put up with it.
On top of that, the problem that needs to be addressed Is that we are willing to degrade a woman’s value if she weren’t to stick with us or to retaliate.
We as men are quick to drop a woman if she chose to sneak out after we cheated frequently. Or are quick to destroy her reputation if she chose not to put up with our toxicity and abuse.
“If you f*** another nigga then You ain’t loyal”. Is what yo Gotti said in a song.
A woman’s loyalty is measured by her sleeping with another but not by the poison you place into her?
If she leaves us we’re suddenly heart broken. Her loyalty was trash, and we can’t live without her. Another part of the toxicity we feed to woman we expect to ride for us.
This type of behavior is perpetuated in the worse by hip hop culture.
Our source for the majority of our outlets. Which limits the defense women have for the “ride or die” mentality embellished in this world.
Fellas, no woman is designed to ride for you. It is a nice proposition. However we have a tendency to take it too far.
For you to expect a woman to ride for you in such ways that it destroys her mentally and physically, often put her against her friends and family as well. this type of behavior says a lot about you as a man and what you bring to the table.
Truth be told a look in the mirror needs to be done honestly.
Thank you for reading.